I’m selecting parts of the article here just to highlight journalistic bullshit. Should News International wish to take action against me, well let us just say that they know my address and leave it at that.

Anyway:

She was stunned when the jumbled letters SHAHSITED clicked over to reveal the swear word.

Stunned? Really? I would have been mildy amused.

Angry Victoria, 30, said yesterday: “I couldn’t believe my eyes as the word was slowly unveiled as an obscene insult.

Firstly, I’ll tackle “Angry”. Was she really angry? Mildly annoyed? Quite bothered? Only she can tell you that.

Next, does “shithead” count as an obscene insult? I think not. The girl in the bank said “shit” when she dropped a bundle of notes last week. Sean Connery said it in Highlander II, so it must be OK. (This is possibly the only time I will acknowledge the existance of Highlander II).

“Oliver is a really bright kid … he was already asking what the word meant   …  my husband Daniel had to rush him out of the room.”

Yeah, because turning the television off was too difficult.

Channel 4 declined to comment yesterday, as did the company who make the game, Koch. Nintendo also would not comment.

Did you actually bother asking them? Probably not. But you do have a history of that, don’t you?

Anyway, was the mother really “outraged” as The Sun headline claims? For what is “outrage”? Well…

1. An act of extreme violence or viciousness.
2. An act grossly offensive to decency, morality, or good taste.
3. A deplorable insult.
4. Resentful anger aroused by a violent or offensive act.

Was mother Victoria carrying a professional quality digital SLR and lighting rig when she spotted this game-based swearyness? She must have been, to be able to take that photo (in the short time before she hustled little Oliver out of the room and back into his secure bunker). Obviously she didn’t have time to clean the shitty fingerprints from the front of the telly.

Or, is that photograph a set-up job? How long would it take to get the same word to show up in the game again?

Clearly the picture has been altered (to blur out the alleged “offensive” bits), but the image on the CRT screen is genuine. So, how can this be?

Well, either the game shows the word “SHITHEADS” every time a News International employee is nearby, or the screen is showing a doctored image displayed from some hack’s laptop.

A ten minute job with Photoshop and a screen grab. Get me a copy of the game and the console hardware and I’ll show you how.

Faking countdown has been done before: see this.

Anyway, who are the “SHITHEADS” here, Nintendo et al, or The Sun?

My money is on The Sun.

Addendum: I’m blocked from commenting on The Sun site now.

(See the story at http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2960673/Ghostly-figure-of-a-weeping-girl-in-mirror-of-hotel-room.html)

This little girl gets about a bit. Sometimes she appears in kitchen door glass (http://www.ghostsandstories.com/little-girl-ghost.html).

But this is hardly surprising considering this iPhone App: http://www.appstorehq.com/ghostcapture-iphone-79452/app

But it isn’t just the outrageous fakery that annoys me. Just read the story for all the signs of Sun Bullshit:

• Unidentified guests
• Unidentified spokesman
• Random words in BOLD CAPITALS

Honestly, if they want some made-up bullshit they should contact me. A copy of my CV should proove fictional enough for them.

Apparently, Bird Flu didn’t scare us enough, so now we have Pig Flu. I’m terrified.

According to the symptoms listed on this picture from Wikipedia, I’ve been suffering from Swine Influenza since about 2002.

Anyway, my recent playing of games on t’internet has also been ruined by needless appearances of this fart-trumpet. And so, I give you…