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Posts Tagged ‘annoying’

The Sun falls for lame fakery

May 6th, 2010 Tony 1 comment

Oh dear, The Sun must be at the barrel scraping stage if they fall for lame rubbish such as this:

(See the story at http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2960673/Ghostly-figure-of-a-weeping-girl-in-mirror-of-hotel-room.html)

This little girl gets about a bit. Sometimes she appears in kitchen door glass (http://www.ghostsandstories.com/little-girl-ghost.html).

But this is hardly surprising considering this iPhone App: http://www.appstorehq.com/ghostcapture-iphone-79452/app

But it isn’t just the outrageous fakery that annoys me. Just read the story for all the signs of Sun Bullshit:

  • Unidentified guests
  • Unidentified spokesman
  • Random words in BOLD CAPITALS

Honestly, if they want some made-up bullshit they should contact me. A copy of my CV should proove fictional enough for them.

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Newsagents

June 16th, 2009 Tony No comments

Does standing in a newsagent’s shop and reading a magazine, and then not buying it, constitute theft (in a very small way)?

Should, therefore, the likes of W.H.Smith’s have the right to remove any information you’ve gleaned from you brain as you leave the shop?

Dear W.H.Smith,

I have a power drill, and will perform lobotomies for free.

Yours etc.

Tony.

Nothing annoys me more* than having to push past “free readers” to get to my copy of Cat Torturer Monthly.

*Actually that is a lie. A lot of things annoy me more. French cars, for example.

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The New Commandments

January 3rd, 2009 Tony No comments

“And the Great One did descend from the mountain, bearing a strange staff,
and looking a lot more like Neptune than he had before.
To the faithful he gave a list of things that should be, and some that should not be.
All who followed his commandments were happy, and those who disobeyed
were cursed with an eternity of non-standard cables and missing driver disks.”

Here are what I shall term as the “New Commandments”.

  1. There shalt be no other interface than mine – All mobile phones, mp3 players, digital cameras and their like shall use a standard USB connector to interface to a computer, and if applicable as a power supply for charging. Nobody want to have to carry a bag of different adaptors, especially when the likes of Nokia can’t decide what size charger you need.
  2. Spread the interface, for the interface is good – All desktop peripherals that use USB (and they all should), must include a built in mini-hub, or at least the ability to daisy chain one device.
  3. Thou shalt not have any graven driver disks – Every USB device that requires special drivers should store them on the device itself in a sort of memory stick ROM. Nothing is more annoying that re-installing your machine an finding that you’ve misplaced a couple of inportant device drivers.
  4. Honour thy specification, and do it properly – If I want to use my camera as a memory stick, I should be able to do it. It shows up as a removable drive on the PC, so it should bloody well connect to the printer for direct printing.
  5. …seriously, do it properly – if the maximum cable length is 4m, bloody well work on a 4m cable.

Follow those five simple rules, and I won’t be forced to visit you with a flensing knife.

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