Tony Blews

At last! Someone is supporting my “drive the distance to the moon and back” idea!
The website thempg.co.uk have offered to promote the idea. Sadly Ford haven’t replied to my various emails, likewise the various fuel companies that I’ve contacted.
I’ve had a few volunteers for the plan, but nobody can commit to the full expedition.
So, here is a revised idea:

• Acquire a used  car or van from some fleet or hire company (not a Picasso!)
• Assemble a team of drivers and work out a schedule to keep said vehicle moving 23 hours a day
• Convince an insurance company to provide cover for nothing
• Blag fuel from some company who need good publicity (BP?)
• Blag free breakdown cover
• Do the thing for charity
• Get free pasties from Ginsters (not a requirement, just a way of feeding my addiction)

Any thoughts?

There are two things which run as constants through my life:  overblown plans that are doomed to failure, and really shit vehicles.

So, why not combine the two? Why not try to take a crappy 50cc bike from one end of Great Britain to the other?

Has it been done before? I don’t know. I don’t really care. Could it be done? Maybe. What would it involve? Well…

Obviously a 50cc moped. To maintain the spirit of the idea it couldn’t possibly be a good moped (such as an Aprilia), but would need to be a “step-thru” such as either a Honda Cub (or equivalent), Honda Melody, or even an old Puch.

Some form of support vehicle would be needed, ideally something Transit sized (to cart the ‘ped down to Cornwall in the first place, and afterwards to provide overnight kipping space). And obviously a driver.

I can’t even guess at fuel costs, as knackered old mopeds aren’t listed on the fuel economy sites, but I don’t think it would be that high.

Is anyone interested?

According to figures published by the Strategic Rail Authority for the financial year 2002/3, 773969 people began their rail journeys from Crewe Railway Station, yet only 763846 people ended journeys there. This represents a net de-population of 10123 people in one year alone, by train alone. This is as close to 10000 people as makes no odds to me.

In the April 2001 census, Crewe had a recorded population of 67683 people. If we’re being generous we can round this up to a guestimate of 70000 people by April 2003.

Given these figures we see that within seven years of April 2003, in other words April 2010, Crewe will become a desolate no-mans-land inhabited only by temporary, transient people on their way to elsewhere.

I was there today. Its happened already.

Postman Pat called this week, delivering somewhat of a surprise. Amid the usual bumf from marketing robots, and a letter addressed to Mr. Austin Allego (more in a future post), he brought 2 DVDs from Paul Balmer of Waterway Routes. Here they are photographed on my nice brown duvet, as my desk is far too cluttered for them to fit on to.

The two DVD sets (Birmingham Canal Navigations and Caldon Canal) each contain two DVDs, a map, an explanatory booklet and a catalogue leaflet, as shown in the awful quality photograph here.

So what is on the DVDs? Well, one from each set contains an overview of the canal system in question, with highlights of the journeys. The other DVD contains a speeded up journey of the entire system, filmed from the box of the boat. Each is narrated by Paul himself (I assume).

Both are fascinating, and well worth the price (especially my free ones), and should Paul ever produce editions for the Lancaster Canal or Staffordshire and Worcestershire Canal I’ll happily fork out the money for them.

Yesterday, while helping clear out my uncle’s house before his move to the new bungalow, I discovered these wonderful photographs of him going on holiday sometime in the late 50s or early 60s.

The Aeroplane

Nothing remarkable here, you may think. It looks quite a small ‘plane, with a big nose.

All aboard!

The passengers are boarding. My uncle, Mr. Harry Blews, is the chap directly below the “T”, and his wife, Mrs. Mary Blews, stands below the “C”.

So far we see nothing out of the ordinary. But hang on! Harry Blews isn’t the sort of man to waste money on airport parking, even in the days when England was still using the Turnip as currency. Neither would he trust his beloved Humber Hawk to the care of Johnny Southerner whilst on a trip to foreign shores.

So then, where is the car?

Crikey!

Yes, for the holiday maker in a hurry, or indeed Morcambe and Wise in That Riviera Touch, the Bristol 170 could carry three cars and their passengers, and at a price that Textiles Manager from Preston could afford. Fantastic. Its almost like science fiction, but from 50 years ago. Can you imagine Ryan Air doing this today? Hell, they’d charge you extra for carrying  the spare wheel.

Jeremy Clarkson once said that the grounding of Concorde was “a massive leap backwards for mankind”. Thats as maybe, but in the 50s people flew on holiday with their cars, and in the 21st Century they don’t. That is what I call a massive leap backwards.

Here is a little bit more information about that particular aircraft…

G-ANWK, a Bristol 170 Mk32, was first registered on Jan 31st, 1956. It was operated by Silver City Airways, between Lydd to Le Touquet, from June of that year until January 1963 when it was taken over by British United Air Ferries. Withdrawn from service in October, 1969, the ‘plane was finally broken up in August, 1970. Here is another photo.