Tony Blews

Skoda Octavia 1.9 Diesel

Skoda were once the butt of all car jokes. Crappy lumps of shite that nobody with half a brain would buy. And then a company with about half a brain bought the entire junkyard they were built in, and things changed. A lot.

Skoda, as we all now know, are owned by Volkswagen - a company, it seems, who have no fucking idea what they are doing.

For example, look back to the Mk I Golf GTi. An absolutely stunning car, and the trend-setter for the Hot Hatch movement. Over the years the turned it into that steaming pile of horse ordure, the Mk V.

Now look at the Mk V GTi. A fat, bulbous lump. Fatter than the winner of Cadbury's Fat Bastard of the Year. Expensive to insure, and not very good. Now, look at a comfortable saloon car built on the Golf V chassis. Now, put a 1.9 turbo diesel engine in it. Now look at the 0-60 times of the Golf-based, diesel powered, saloon car and the Golf MK V GTi. Now look at the cost of each.

Having driven both cars, I can honestly say that the Skoda is more fun. The Octavia handles better that the Golf. It corners better, slides better, accelerates better, ia cheaper and has four doors. And, it looks nicer. See for yourself:

  Ugly, nasty, shite

Stylish, refined, slightly cool.

The Octavia wipes the floor with the Golf. How can this happen? What the fuck is going on at Volkswagen?